Housekeeping: glass houses

People who live in glass houses: do not throw stones!

A messy house can sometimes be an indicator of emotional distress. Many roommates and officemates are terrible at housekeeping and their living area or workspace is rarely neat or tidy. People in crisis are quick to point out the pathology of others, even while they offend those around them. In fact, some roommates and officemates like to point out the potential psychosis of those who are too neat.

Obsessive-Compulsive Disorder (OCD) and Obsessive-Compulsive Personality Disorder (OCPD) are forms of mental illness; each with distinct characteristics; however, people with mental illness are entitled to care, compassion, treatment, and accommodations. Yet, clinical intervention is usually unavailable at home or at work. Furthermore, many choose to remain undiagnosed fearing the stigma associated with any specific mental illness, emotional ability, or developmental disorder.

Excessive clutter-keeping or mess-making can be a warning sign of mental illness or emotional

problems. Unkept surroundings may be rooted in confused thinking habits. Illogical thinking may lead to a pattern of disturbing behaviors and once triggered, an old trauma may manifests itself. Someone who was once just messy, a little disorganized, or whose workspace was always a bit cluttered seemingly, is suddenly so much worse. For example, hoarding is a form of mental illness, but the compulsion to do so may be a symptom of dementia. In a coworker or housemate clutter-keeping or mess-making may be a silent request for an intervention. Messiness alone may not be a symptom of mental illness, but a disorganized individual may still benefit from socio-emotional support for improved life-skills and enriched professionalism.

Throughout the Covid-19 pandemic, Zoom, Skype, and Google Meet video conferencing services have become mainstream resources. People are using these communication platforms to facilitate transactions, remain connected, and to fill the gaps left by self-quarantining or sheltering-in-place. Virtual meetings have also enabled, though unintentionally, the inclination to blur the lines between work responsibilities and home life commitments. Whether sitting in a cluttered home office or at a disorganized desk on-site with an employer, once the cameras are enable, any observer can judge the workspace as messy or neat.

Meeting attendees routinely have access to the intrusive eye of the video camera. The camera is a window; a one-way glass or two-way mirror.

The next time you are looking through the camera window, into someone else's life, resist the temptation to throw stones. When cameras are enabled, meeting attendees operate as actors in two roles: one as a member of the audience and the other is on life's stage. The ubiquitous floor to ceiling wall of books is frequently seen in the background, but so too is the cluttered desk, the messy floor, and disheveled furniture. You may perceive the disorganization as the confused speaker's passive request for help or, maybe your housemate needs permission to de-stress. Before making any assumptions, either way, take the time for self-care and then offer to help.